I'm sure it was only yesterday when I groggily cried out in the darkness, "Will she never sleep through the night?" The older moms smiled knowingly, "Someday." Now she answers groggily when I try to wake her in the morning.
I agonized over multiple accidents and hours of reading by the potty chair with no results. "Will he ever be potty trained?" Again, the smiles. "No child ever goes to kindergarten in a diaper." With kindergarten two years back, I can now smile in agreement.
"He wants me to carry him every moment. Will he ever walk?" Though the first steps didn't come until he was 15 months old, he no longer rides on my hip.
Tests, ointments, medications, dietary changes...."Will my baby ever look normal?" The doctor chirped, "Oh, he will grow out of it!" I kiss the smooth cheeks and hands today and realize once again...
Someday has come. This is what I wished for through sleepless nights, bouts of ill health, developmental delays and the minutiae of motherhood. I skipped through so many stages instead of strolling. I longed for better days only to realize too late that the long days would melt into short years.
Today I make the choice to revel in this day. This someday. Time will march on, and new somedays will come. They will be beautiful. But today......today I will embrace the imperfections, the immaturities, and the stages. Ah, the stages!
Never again will this girl be in the pendulum that tilts towards childhood and womanhood by turns with me hanging on for the ride.
Never again will this boy ask the endless questions that build the foundation of future ideas and dreams.
Never again will this boy be in the carefree preschool days when play is work and work is play and both are performed without hurry.
Never again will this boy insist on his pacifier and carrying the jug of milk in from the car in the same 24-hour time period.
Never again will this mom be the mom of today.
I've reached the someday, and I think I'm content to stop looking for it.
beautiful!! typing with one hand and holding today in my arms and remembering to relish it. thank you. beautiful writing.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Sarah! Remembering those days when I typed with one hand and realizing once again that this is my someday. Blessings to you! Thanks so much for reading and for your comment.
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